It has been nearly 7 years since I became a horse owner for the first time. I remember the emotions of those first few days so well. I went back to the first few blog posts, just to see what they said. I thought I'd bring you back to when this blog started.... the day after I agreed to buy my very first horse. I hadn't even brought him home yet. :)
What I just love, is what I articulated as my first set of Overanxious fears: finances, my "nerve", him getting sick, him hating me, being too busy to ride....
Finances: Always an issue. Horses are expensive. Horse care is expensive. There is always more STUFF I want. But I've managed to manage.
My "nerve": It came back, mostly, but I am still more comfortable with a quiet horse. I think the biggest key to getting my nerve back was riding enough to get my balance back. Riding through a buck or a spook is a lot easier when you have a solid seat.
Him getting sick: Well, yeah. That happened. It was awful. It's still awful. I miss him every day. I will have a Junior-sized hole in my heart forever. Colic is still scary to me and it will always be scary to me. But I lived through it. I'm still here.
Him hating me: I should have worried about me hating him! Those first six months were horrible. I was terrified of him and he had no respect for me..... we worked it out eventually and I know he "loved" me or he wouldn't have worked for me the way he did. I certainly loved him.
Being too busy to ride: Oh yeah, that happens all the time, but it balances out. I've found, though, that even when I'm my busiest I've found that if I take the time to ride, the busy doesn't seem as overwhelming. It's amazing what a little barn time can do. :)
And don't you wonder what brought on this bout of history and reflection?